I can't beat this headline. How about "Man Fires Back at Backfire"? Naw... They Shoot Horsepower, Don't They?
Wed Apr 20, 2005 - Reuters

Fed up with his troublesome car, a Florida man fired five rounds from a semi-automatic pistol into the hood of the 1994 Chrysler LeBaron.

"I'm putting my car out of its misery," 64-year-old John McGivney said after the incident outside an apartment building in Lauderdale-By-The-Sea, according to a police report that listed the car as "deceased."  ¶ 4:53 PM