Some James Taranto headlines...
What Would We Do Without Crash Tests?"Smaller Cars Perform Poorly in Crash Test"--headline, Associated Press, Dec. 19
They're Tired of Rooting for the Arizona Cardinals"Vatican Mulls Fielding Football Team"--headline, Agence France-Presse, Dec. 18
Let's See . . . Wings?"One Key to Bird Flight Discovered"--headline, LiveScience.com, Dec. 18
Smart Kidnappers, Foolish Choices"Suspected Smart Kidnapper Yells at Judge"--headline, Associated Press, Dec. 18
Fitch Walks Free"Abercrombie Gets 15 Months"--headline, Sarasota (Fla.) Herald-Tribune, Dec. 18
Bottom Stories of the Day:"Actress Enters Drug Rehab Program"--headline, Associated Press, Dec. 19
"City Doesn't Act on Rezoning"--headline, Herald Times (Manitowoc, Wis.), Dec. 19
"Sean Penn: Impeach George W. Bush, Dick Cheney"--headline, FoxNews.com, Dec. 19
"France Beats a Retreat"--headline, Chicago Sun-Times, Dec. 18